Free from the grips of addiction

One of my low points in life was my battle with my addiction to opioids. At the young age of 24 I had my first major surgery. I was to completely replace my right hip. I was a young mother by then, shacked up with their dad, who wasn't a good partner. I got prescribed narcotics and my life was never the same afterwards.

In my previous post I wrote about my diagnosis after I graduated high school. They pumped me with so much immunosuppressant medications that by the time I was 24 years old the effects of that medication reached my bones. We found out (Lupus was still a big mystery in 2000) that apparently if you take a lot of those immunosuppressant meds, the blood will stop flowing to your joints, thereby causing the joint to deteriorate. This is called avascular necrosis.

But that's not when my low point was. It came after many years of being on heavy pain meds that I had become addicted. I didn't even see it coming, but as soon as I knew it, I couldn't function without it. I had two young sons, and an abusive boyfriend, I felt like I needed it. I started buy off the streets and stealing from a very close dear friend. This was my lowest.

Since then, I have had another three major surgeries. I now have totally replaced both hips and my left knee. I was still on pain meds but doing better by using it as prescribed, not going over. I still felt like I was still in the grips of the addiction, because I felt like I still needed it and it was still constantly on my mind. Do I have enough?


It wasn't until I started consciously medicating with cannabis about 3 years ago was I free from the grips of addiction and started my healing journey. Unfortunately, I will always have chronic pain, it's inevitable with my disease. This will not be the end as well because I have a lot of surgeries in my future, but that's not for another decade, hopefully.

The good news is that in my healing journey I was able to decrease my overall prescription medications. I used to take heavy sleeping pills too, but thanks to cannabis and a healthy diet was I able to stop that. Sometimes I even forget about my pain pills all together, and that's something I never thought would happen! Never! That's a huge win and one of the reasons why I advocate for cannabis hard.

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